The "thing"

I am not referring to a film or character. I am referring to Naomi's latest all-encompassing word - "I want the thing", "pass me the thing", "make me a thing". It's so exasperating trying to work out what she means. Even Josh had had enough this morning and said (I distinctly heard myself) "Don't just say the thing, tell us what it is".

All Change

I was commenting to Steve about how different the end of the school year is here compared to when we taught in England. There it was all excitement when the summer holidays rolled around and a sense of anticipation. Here, there is some excitement - especially as we look forward to our visitors but mostly the end of the school year is marked by some sadness and a lot of goodbyes. I think that is the hardest part of our life here. There are goodbyes every year - and it really doesn't get easier.

Rose has been off school most of the week as she has been so ill and yet it is really important to Steve and I that she attend flag-lowering tomorrow so that she can begin to understand the importance of closure (a word I don't think I ever heard before coming here!).

This week has been a week of "lasts". Last time I go in and help Kindergarten (till Josh starts anyway, but it will be a different group of kids and a different teacher), last time I do my car pool run to pick kids up after school, last Wednesday Rose gets off every week, last preschool at our house. It's been a strange feeling as it feels a bit like my schedule is disappearing!

And then there are the goodbyes. After our staff banquet one of the new teacher's wives asked me if it was typical to see 40 staff members leaving. It is. Some will be back after Home Assignment but most will not.

And yet, the amazing flip side of all this is that our lives, my life, has been so enriched by the people I have met because we came here, and I would never have met them any other way. And it doesn't matter how long they stay here, they bring love and friendship and joy and different perspective and a richness I would not have known without them. But it means I have to be willing to receive all those things God offers me through them by being prepared to embrace change.

Water fight

This afternoon we had reached that point where Josh had been bottled up too long. Rose has been running a temperature and full of a cold so we haven't been out the last couple of days and certainly not swimming - that great energy user! We did all go shopping this morning which just about wiped Rose out but I think she and Josh were cabin crazy so I decided to take them all with me. Anyway, I wanted to sit outside and read my paper while the kids played in the tub with water but Josh wanted to spray the girls and neither was very interested so I decided I had to engage him. I took a squirter and set up a water bowl for him at the back and I had the front and we had so much fun. He started to understand how to use tactics too which made it even more fun and it was so hot it was a relief to cool off. If I had been determined to be selfish I could have missed out on a lot of fun and a good bonding experience with my son.

The Importance of Zebra

Today I think I made a significant step. It may sound silly to you, it may seem unnecessary, but I gave my children permission to speak "American". Actually, I think it was more giving yself permission to let go of something I have been holding on to too long and too hard.

When we knew we were going to raise a family here, we knew they would imbibe a large part of American culture as well as some Filipino and we were OK with that - it goes with the territory of being here and we think that is the place we should be. However, I think I have struggled with this more than I thought I would. Today Rose asked me whether zebra is pronounced zebra or zeebra. I told her British people said zebra, Americans say zeebra and she could choose whatever she wanted. Funnily, she then said zebra! But the point was I realised it doesn't matter how she says it or whether she says it the same as I do. Most of my friends pronounce it zeebra and it doesn't bother me. It's not going to affect the essence of who she is which is beyond any culture or way of pronunciation. And that's much more important to me.

Good brother, good friend

I am learning quite a lot about my children's characters at the moment. Naomi and I were having an altercation about not taking the clothes-pegs into the shower. She started crying so Joshua went and got the lion and cheetah and brought them, saying, "Naomi likes these". I have to admit I was sceptical that it would make any difference - it probably wouldn't have if I had done it! But she took them and stopped crying and I was impressed that Josh knew what her favourite toys were. I told him he was a good brother and a good friend.

Of course, it all went pear shaped in the shower when Naomi accidentally stood on Josh's sore toe, but I figure you have to celebrate the moments when everything is as you would want!

Lemon Curd

The following conversation encapsulates the battles I have had with Rose this week.

Debs: What would you like for breakfast?

Rose: Toast with lemon curd.

Debs: Oh, I'm sorry. We finished the lemon curd. We have to wait for granny and grandpa to bring some more.

Rose: I want lemon curd.

Debs: Yes, but I've just told you - there isn't any.

Rose: I WANT LEMON CURD!

Debs: (laughing at the absurdity of this conversation). Rose, there isn't any.

Rose: LEMON CURD

At this point I inform Rose that when she has decided to choose something we do have, I will make the toast.

Mother's Day

I think it is only the British who celebrate Mother's Day at a different time? Anyway, it was Mother's Day here on Sunday. In theory I think the idea is quite a good one - mums don't seem to get much recognition any other time - but, in practice, I'm not sure.

I mean, it seems to me it becomes this celebration of this perfect paragon of a mother which I don't believe exists. I don't recognise myself in this image. If I am to be recognised for being a mother, I want it to be acknowledged that sometimes I struggle, sometimes I mess up, often I don't feel I am the mum I would like to be; basically, that I am flawed but I am walking with God to do the best we can do. Just like every other area of my life.

Mum's Expo

One of my friends taking childbirth classes was told about a "Mom's Expo" and asked me if I wanted to go with her. It was a fun outing. We had no idea where the expo was once we got to the mall and decided Starbucks was the first port of call - after the obligatory toilet stop for the pregnant lady!!

So the funny thing was after our drink we asked the guard at the mall door where the expo was and he pointed out the door at the building and said - "There!"

It was only a small exhibition but we picked up some great items - I got some presents and the other two got breast-feeding tops (don't have to go there again!), found a sling which they actually couldn't buy because they only had the samples, a cool baby T-shirt which read "Made in the Philippines", and other bits.

"birthday" party

As Rose's friends are going to be away for her birthday in July we decided to throw her a party before they left. It was fun but felt a bit strange. We started with swimming which was a good move as we didn't have to 'entertain' them and they weren't so wild when they got to the playground. Bonnie came to help and Betsy came and joined us too which was really helpful. We chose to do healthy snacks and Rose has asked for a pyramid cake. We did pass the parcel, Rose opened presents and we were all done.

more photos here

Admin Council

Straight after conference - well Tuesday - I was in Quezon City for 3 days' council. I had an interesting start as the taxi i got in to take me to the centre assured me he knew a short-cut to the main road we were travelling on and I tentatively agreed to him taking me but I was a little anxious the first few minutes as those horror stories from the Travel Guides played on my mind but it turned out to be a good short-cut although I could never do it myself as we wound through all these back streets in the barangay. In the evening I had arranged to meet my friends at the mall but the traffic was dreadful and as I couldn't figure out which bus was going my way I ended up in another taxi. Plus my mobile phone died and I got a bit confused about where we were meeting but thankfully some other friends happened to be at the restaurant and I used their phone to call! We tried a new Indian place and it was great.

I took the non-aircon bus back for 25 pesos! It took 20 minutes as traffic was better and the buses drive madly up that road.

Weds. I got a surprise invite to see Wolverine so I went as I felt I needed the mindless entertainment after a heavy day! It was good to get out of the centre for two evenings as sometimes I find it a little claustrophobic spending all day there in meetings and then being there by myself in the evenings too. But it does give me space and time to read which I appreciate.

Thursday we finished early which was another pleasant surprise and it was nice to have a full afternoon home with the family. I had to make Rose's birthday cake for her party on Friday anyway but more on that.....

Conference

This weekend (thursday evening to Sunday morning) was our organisation's conference. I was on the planning committee - which has not been the easiest job but it was great to see everything come together.

I decided we would go the back route to get there and was very glad we did as we had the beautiful scenery and missed the horrible traffic and although, it is a slightly longer route we arrived just before the others coming through the bad traffic. We were even able to open our windows and enjoy the fresh air and travel at a fairly fast pace in places! Unfortunately, Rose was pretty sick on the way - not sure if it was the winding roads. But even she could still enjoy the adventure. I really enjoyed just hanging out and talking with the kids in the car. The funniest thing we saw was a pig in the back of a private jeepney!

One of our friends very generously went to pick Steve up from the airport Thursday night and we were all glad to have him back. We hardly saw Rose all weekend as she was in her own little social whirl and, I think, would have spent all day in her "class" if she could. She ate her meals with her friends too!

Josh was a little bit leery about joining the kids' program, but they were very good with him and eventually he actually enjoyed going! :)

Naomi was sharing a double bed with Rose and was the other side of Josh's bed and she would roll onto his bed in the night. The first night Josh woke up and woke me up to tell me she was on his bed so I put her back. He couldn't remember this in the morning. The other nights he didn't even notice - probably more to do with their tiredness than anything else. The only downside of going away is the late nights for the kids as they don't sleep any later in the morning. (Especially when mummy thinks it's 7:30 and panics we are going to miss breakfast and then when everyone is up, realises it's only 5:30!!! Early swimming.)